At the risk of sounding like a toddler, I think we all need to ask ourselves one single question much more often. That question is WHY? If you’ve ever been around a toddler, you know that is the magical question for them. They are people working every day to understand the world and that is the very question they need. We can really take a lesson from toddlers! We can deduce that if we want to continue to understand new things about the world, we need to be asking this question much, much more often.
Why is defined as “a question concerning the cause or reason for which something is done.” If I know my logical thinkers, I know that we love this question. We ask it all day long when it comes to engineering designs and work challenges. But how many opportunities do we miss by not asking this in our personal lives more?
Let’s talk a little bit about others first. Toddlers ask this question very genuinely, never from a place of judgement. How often do we “ask” the question as a form of judgement rather than to truly seek information? “Why did he say THAT in the meeting” is said with an eye roll rather than a curious and open mind. With this approach, we really aren’t genuinely seeking to understand the reason for that person’s choice. Simply shifting the intention behind how you ask this question will change your relationships. For those of you who have heard me explain the Logical Evolution Framework, this is tapping into the power of the Coherent Paradigm. I’d like to see us shift our reactive judgement response to a genuine curiosity. I guarantee you that this one shift would change the world.
I want to shift now to ourselves, because often we are this way toward others because we have stopped asking the same question of ourselves. It is a tenet of the Logical Evolution Framework that you must apply the principles to yourself to affect meaningful change.
This question is the go-to for young children who are seeking to understand the world. Why are they seeking to understand it? So they can navigate it with excellence! With an accurate knowledge of why things happen the way they do, we can make choices that will be more effective in gaining the outcome we desire.
As you may know if you have been asked this question repeatedly by a toddler, there is no question that can reveal your ignorance quickly if you let it. Children have a knack of asking until they get to a real reason. We need to question ourselves with “why” until we get to a real reason too. We must reject the lazy answers like “because I said so” and the lies like “the toy store is closed so we can’t go” (when it isn’t).
What I’d like to suggest to you today is that this question is your ticket to change! To have the most impact, ask this in areas of your life where you want change, and have been trying to change, but you are not getting different results. Keep asking it until you get a real answer which will help you see where the next effort needs to be directed.
What do you really want? What are the choices you are making that affect that outcome? Why have you been making those choices? Keep the why going a few levels until you’ve revealed new information to yourself. If you do this without judgement and a true willingness to find out the truth, you will be amazed.
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